Zim is Bitten!
by otherrealmwriter
Summary: In an attempt to destroy Zim, Dib tricks a vampire into biting Zim. What happens to all involved? Written for the Fireplace Alliance Challenge.


**I do not own Invader Zim, okay? This is for The Fireplace Alliance's challenge; make a clichéd plot new and fresh. Well, after much pondering, this seems to be a new twist on a worn out plot. Let me know what you think in a review. Well, enough of this A/N, on with the fic!**

Dib lay in bed, reading latest reports on vampires as part of his paranormal research. "I don't know who filed this report, but they were off." Dib said as he read a report from Seattle about a sparkly vampire. "Even a child knows vampires do not sparkle. That and you would not find one in an Italian restaurant. Maybe I can find one closer to home." Dib whispered as he hacked into the database of the police and coroner's office. "If I find one I can convince to feed off of Zim…" Dib said as he pulled out a wooden stake and made a thrusting motion as if to slay a vampire.

Dib had it in his mind that he could destroy Zim easier if he was a vampire. He was going to trick a vampire into biting Zim and then after the transformation, Dib would stake him, and thus, save the Earth and get rid of Zim, all in one blow of the wooden stake. It was much simpler than all of his other plans and took much less effort. Dib read reports of the local police and smiled when he saw a report of a pale man who was involved in a "satanic cult" series of murders where blood was sucked out of two about three inches apart pin-prick holes in the victim's jugular vein. The police were on an all city manhunt for him, looking for him. The report said he went by Edwin Drakeles and he broke out of prison in a mysterious manner. None of the forensic team had any clue as how he could do it. _Hmmmm…. This guy seems like the perfect one to bite Zim. He seems like a young and bloodthirsty vampire. I should be able to convince this vampire easily. Simply tell him Zim's blood is the sweetest in the world; that should convince him to do it._ With this, Dib put on his trench coat and began to walk outside.

"Where are you going at this time of night?" Professor Membrane said as Dib walked pass him, nonchalantly.

"I'm going to The Effigy, Dad. I am hanging out with kids my own age, instead of chasing the paranormal. You always wanted me to do that." Dib snapped back at him.

"Sounds good to me son. I approve of this new behavior you are exhibiting!" Professor Membrane said as he put a thumbs-up sign to Dib.

"I'm glad Dad." Dib smiled as he walked out of the door and headed to The Effigy. During his time investigating the paranormal, he learned how to get around his dad and feed him stories that he would believe and would leave him alone, thus making him free to investigate the paranormal. "I'll see you later okay?" He said as he closed the door.

_Now, I have to make this seem appealing to that guy. I know he will be at The Effigy and I know he will be obvious; not so obvious as to get himself arrested again, but obvious. _Dib thought as he paid for his entrance into the club and looked around. All the Goth looking people were heading into a dark corner behind the bar, but in between the restroom. In the center of the crowd was the man he was looking for.

"Hey! Edwin!" Dib yelled from across the crowd. "I know what you are. Moreover, I know what you would want. The perfect place is here." He said.

"How can I trust you?" Edwin asked walking up to Dib.

"I know how sweet this kid's blood is." Dib said flashing fake vampire fangs he had put in on the way to the Effigy. He knew he had to be convincing if Edwin was going to bite Zim. "I sucked his blood the other night, and I had to control myself. I wanted to savor it so much."

"Yeah?" Edwin asked suspiciously.

"Yes. Here is his address." Dib said as he smiled with his fake vampire fangs showing dipped with green dye.

Edwin took the note and read it a couple of times. He smiled and looked at Dib. "I hope you don't mind but I may make this kid one of us. Do you care?"

"No. Go ahead." Dib smirked. "Well, I must go feed somewhere else now. Happy hunting." Dib said as he walked out of The Effigy. _Moreover, by the end of three days, I will have destroyed Zim and saved the world. _ Dib thought as he removed the fake fangs and headed back home.

Meanwhile, Zim was sitting in his base, completely unaware of what was going to happen to him in the next hour. He looked up at the TV and saw GIR was watching The Scary Monkey Show yet again. "GIR, you've seen this episode before." Zim sighed as he saw the monkey panting on screen.

"No master, this is a new episode." GIR said.

"How can you tell?" Zim asked exasperated. "Well, I have to go finish an experiment. See you later GIR!" Zim said as he headed to the toilet and went down to his labs.

"BYE MASTER!" GIR yelled as Zim flushed himself down the toilet. Soon after Zim's head was nowhere to be seen, the doorbell rung. "YEAY! A STRANGER!" GIR yelled as he opened the door to reveal Edwin Drakeles standing in the doorway.

"Ummm…" Edwin said looking down at GIR "…is your owner home little green dog?"

"Yes! I will show him to you!" GIR said as he looked to Edwin. "You don't need to stand out side. Come in."

"Thank you little green dog. Where is he?" Edwin asked.

"Just go down this toilet! I'll flush it for you." GIR said as Edwin walked down the toilet and headed down to Zim's labs below. _Thank you little green dog._ Edwin thought as he headed down into Zim's lab poised to make this kid with the green blood his slave vampire for all time. As soon as the door opened, he headed to Zim.

"Hello green kid." Edwin said with an evil smile on his face. "You look delicious tonight."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Zim asked as Edwin moved closer and sunk his fangs into Zim's neck.

"Oh god. That big headed Vampire was right." Edwin said as he savored the blood of the Irken in his mouth.

"Big headed vampire? Dib is a vampire?" Zim said as Edwin pulled away from Zim's neck.

"In three days, you will be mine." Edwin said as he headed out of Zim's labs.

"COMPUTER!" Zim said, "Analyze this injury."

"Analyzing." Zim's computer sighed. "Analyses complete. You will only have an itch on your neck. Human vampires have little effect on Irkens."

"That's good." Zim sighed as he went back to his experiment.

Meanwhile, Edwin was not feeling very good about his latest feeding. He had a stomachache when the blood hit his stomach. _I do not feel very good. _Edwin thought as he headed back to The Effigy. Edwin looked down at his hand and saw it start to turn green and become claw like. The Irken DNA in Zim's blood was fusing in like a cancer, making Edwin collapse. He saw his legs start to turn skinny. _What was in that kid's blood? I have sucked many a person with disease and I did not have any problems, not even that junkie who was down with Hepatitis C and shot up pain pills. What is happening? _ Edwin thought as he looked down and saw his skin turn green. He felt a disturbance on his head and felt his hair fall out of his head, which turned green and antennae grew out of his head. Edwin moaned and looked in a puddle of water.

"Oh god! I look like that kid!" He yelled as he fell into the pool of water. "IT BURNS!" Edwin yelled as he fell in. Soon Edwin became less cognitive and his reaction slowed. _I think… I think I am dying._ Edwin thought as he looked at his newly Irken body decay from lack of a PAK. He then collapsed in the puddle and died.


End file.
